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Thursday, February 09 2012

Audio: Zombie invasion is 'a matter of time', says Ashford expert

Sean Page from Ashford, author of the Official Zombie Handbookby Thom Morris

An outbreak of zombies is a matter of when and not if, according to a former Ashford man who has written a handbook on the subject.

Sean Page, 39, claims that people – including his own parents in Willesborough – remain unprepared for an invasion of the living dead.

The former Norton Knatchbull school pupil, left, said: “With any survival technique it’s all about the preparation.

“You need to do your research and plan now – for instance where you’re going to store food and drink, how to fortify your house, and so on.

“I used my parents’ house as an example. I looked around and saw their back door and thought 'that’s horrendous; that isn’t going to stop a zombie’.

"You need to be looking around your home and thinking about how a zombie is going to get in.”

Mr Page claims that a decade ago, a human’s lifetime risk of developing into a zombie was one in 12, and that today it is one in nine.

Audio: Sean talks to Thom Morris about zombies

He says fatty foods, binge-drinking and white bread have all been linked by UK scientists to zombification.

The Official Zombie Handbook, written by the first-time author who works for multi-national catering giant Sodexo, also features a chapter on how best to deal with the menace should you be confronted.

Mr Page added: “In the book I’ve plotted some outbreaks historically to give people an idea, but with the huge growth in population and frequent air travel I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s likely to happen in the next 20 to 30 years.

“It really isn’t a question of if, but when.”

The book, published by Severed Press, is available at www.amazon.com

Mr Page will also be unveiling his book at Zombie Fest in Milton Keynes in mid-August.

Friday, July 30 2010

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Comments (16)

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  • Doesnt Matter wrote:

    His book sounds vaguely familiar, like I read something similar almost a decade ago. I just cant place it, oh I've got it the "ZOMBIE SURVIVAL GUIDE".

    26 Jun 2011 8:43 AM

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  • Sean T Page wrote:

    I didn't really like Zombieland - Day of the Dead is a much better film.

    I would stress that these movies are not SCIENCE - my book is.

    I will take that bet Smilerbaker if you are offering it...my family do indeed work in Ashford but in a bank & factories not the newspaper....

    Email me your address & I'll send you a copy - you can see what you think..

    Email to :

    imabitgrumpy@hotmail.com


    04 Aug 2010 11:25 AM

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  • Kaylee wrote:

    To smilerbaker :

    Zombieland does look good on the reviews. Will check it out.
    BTW - do you have something against KM? Serious accusation about nepotism ... or did an article about yourself just failed to make the grade? ... mmmm

    04 Aug 2010 10:54 AM

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  • smilerbaker wrote:

    Jay - no he isn't, there are quite a few zombie survival manual books out there. Even a recent film, zombieland. my moneys on this clown being related to someone at km

    04 Aug 2010 7:56 AM

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  • Wills wrote:

    Zombies are dangerous mofo's, but the ones you really want to fear, the worst kind are... iZombies.

    iZombies share the same streets, the same shopping isles and the same cafes as you and I. They walk into busy roads without looking, walk into other people on the pavement and bump into you on public transport causing major nuisance and life threatening bruising.

    iZombies are far harder to recognise than regular zombies as they seem perfectly normal until they get an iPhone or similar internet enabled phone in their hands, then they mutate. This is a real plague, affecting the whole world, 1 iPad is selling every 3 seconds throughout the world.

    We need to stop the spread, take out the iTrash and make our streets safe again. Who's with me?

    03 Aug 2010 6:54 PM

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  • Jay wrote:

    With all the bad press and bad news stories at present, this is just the kind of article we need .............. I've ordered the book! Mr Page is obviously a very imaginative and talented author, good luck, I look forward to receiving my copy

    03 Aug 2010 1:28 PM

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  • Sean T Page wrote:

    Many thanks all for your kind words, apart from the one about the looney bin.

    Zombies are truly a menace we need to face so people must know the truth...

    I was out shopping in Ashford town centre this weekend & I'm sure I saw a couple coming out of Millets..

    Come to think if it, Argos looked a bit dicey as well...

    Follow the madness at

    www.ministryofzombies.com

    03 Aug 2010 12:13 PM

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  • Kaylee wrote:

    Ha Ha!I see the funny side too. At least Kentish Express is giving us more interesting articles rather than 'who did what and when' news (Snore ...). Good on you! Makes for a good laugh (for people with a sense of humour that is!). Got to run, getting myself a baseball bat from the sports retail outlet at £3 a piece.

    03 Aug 2010 11:58 AM

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  • Katie wrote:

    Invation? :S

    02 Aug 2010 1:34 PM

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  • smilerbaker wrote:

    and this made the news why?? seriously KM needs to decide where they are going with this site, the news is a joke and the layout appalling, and don't even mention the loading times.

    02 Aug 2010 9:22 AM

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  • Lucy wrote:

    Is zombies did attack, who cares about all that rubbish you want get the foods and other stuff needed and go to a gun shop and rack up on your weapons and swords and bassball bats. got to have some of the classic weapons now lol I'm sure they give them out for free is zombies was attacking.

    02 Aug 2010 3:25 AM

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  • John wrote:

    Im Battering down the hatchets as we speak who knows could be true :)

    01 Aug 2010 9:22 PM

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  • Mike wrote:

    Haha, very good! Shame some people didn't see the funny side.

    31 Jul 2010 1:00 AM

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  • Jim wrote:

    Get a sense of humour jeeze. It's just a bit of fun! ever heard of that?

    30 Jul 2010 6:13 PM

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  • Alex wrote:

    What a loser! Escaped from the looney bin again?

    30 Jul 2010 4:42 PM

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  • Jay wrote:

    Geezer sounds like he's lost it...

    30 Jul 2010 3:13 PM

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