Out of luck with Chuck
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MY MOVIE WEEK with Mike Shaw
» Something that I was excited about but am no
longer interested in is The Expendables 2. What has caused this
massive swing in sentiment?
Chuck Norris.
He’s a man with many special skills but now it seems he has the
power to turn a kick-ass action film with loads of guns and action
movie stars into a family-friendly flick with no bad language. The
first Expendables film was super-violent with tons of swearing and
explosions and was brilliant. The sequel did have more violence,
more swearing, more explosions and more old-school action stars...
but then Chuck got involved.
Norris said: “In Expendables 2, there was a lot of vulgar
dialogue in the screenplay. For this reason, many young people
wouldn’t be able to watch this. But I don’t play in movies like
this. Due to that I said I won’t be a part of that if the hardcore
language is not erased. Producers accepted my conditions and the
movie will be classified PG-13.”
At first, people thought his statement was just the ramblings of
a man who has received too many kicks to the head but alas, it
turns out it’s true. I couldn’t be more disappointed if the whole
cast was replaced with Keanu Reeves lookalikes.
Almost every big budget film is made with a family audience in
mind and I enjoy the rare movies that are made for adults who like
a bit of dumb action that hasn’t been diluted by studios eager to
claw in some extra cash from idiot teenagers. Of course, the proof
will be in the final product, but I hope that we’ll get a glorious,
unsanitised kill-a-thon on DVD.
» It’s been a long time since we heard anything
about the animated adaptation of the excellent comic book series
Bone but finally there’s some movement. PJ Hogan (Muriel’s Wedding,
My Best Friend’s Wedding, Peter Pan) has signed on to direct and TV
writer Patrick Sean Smith is handling the script.
Published by Jeff Smith between 1991 and 2004, Bone is a weird
story about three small, hairless cousins – Fone Bone, Smiley Bone
and Phoney Bone who are kicked out of Boneville when Phoney messes
up a run for mayor. They eventually find themselves in a mysterious
place called the Valley, where they meet Thorn and her grandmother,
Rose. It’s silly and slapstick, but later becomes really quite
serious and packed with allegory and it’s brilliant. I’m really
looking forward to this film.
» Sweet Valley High fans, your favourite
book/TV series is coming to the big screen and it’s going to be a
musical. Juno writer Diablo Cody is scribbling this one and said:
“There’s original songs being written for it right now, which is
the most exciting development. They’re being written by these Tony
and Pulitzer-winning songwriters from Broadway.”
She also said that her film is going to be “to the 1980s what
American Graffiti was to the early 1960s,” which sounds a little
over the top, but we’ll see.
While Juno was practically perfect, everything Cody has done
since has been unmitigated rubbish so she’s due another hit.
Tuesday, January 31 2012
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