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Death of YouTube vlogger PeeWeeToms leaves Canterbury Christ Church University student Becca Thomas a widow at 21

By Claisse Opulencia

Their joy as the exchanged vows and kissed on their wedding day was overwhelming.

But just two weeks later it turned to grief as new bride Becca Thomas became a widow at just 21 - her husband Dan cruelly taken from her by cancer.

It was a bleak outcome the couple knew was inevitable, following Dan's terminal diagnosis, but they had hoped for more time together as man and wife.

Becca and Dan's wedding day kiss (5394767)
Becca and Dan's wedding day kiss (5394767)

"He’d gone from being okay and us being married for a few days to the cancer reaching his heart and lungs," said Becca, who is studying English language and communication at Canterbury Christ Church University.

"It was horrendous. I remember crying my heart out when the doctor told me that they was nothing they could do."

Now Becca is hoping to raise awareness of the rare cancer which claimed her husband's life and how young widows can be supported.

The couple first met at a Starbucks near the London Eye in early in 2018 and, at first, just became good friends

Becca Thomas spoke of her feelings in a YouTube video (5394781)
Becca Thomas spoke of her feelings in a YouTube video (5394781)

Dan, 32, a software developer, had already been diagnosed with one of the rarest forms of cancer, pleomorphic sarcomatoid carcinomas three years earlier, which he was later told had become terminal.

He became a prolific vlogger about his fight with the disease, attracting 100,000 subscribers.

Not wanting to hurt anyone’s feelings and fearing the consequences of attachment, he had avoided a close relationship with anyone.

But as their friendship grew, so did the couple's feelings for each other.

Becca, who is from Tunbridge Wells, said: "At first, we had this joke where we weren’t going to get attached to each other.

"That’s only because he wanted to protect my feelings.

The couple's wedding day dance (5394775)
The couple's wedding day dance (5394775)

"But one day, we were at the pub and he said, ‘you know what? This is really stupid, let’s just put a label on it. From that moment onwards, I didn’t leave his side."

Becca then spent every day with Dan, never leaving him to attend a single hospital appointment or surgery on his own.

She stood outside the door at every one of Dan’s surgeries and the inseparable pair moved in together and spent every day as if it were the last.

Despite being terminally ill, Becca and Dan made sure that they still lived adventurous lives like any young couple.

“Dan never wanted the fact that he had cancer to get in the way of life, " she said.

Becca's tattoo is in Dan's handwriting (5394771)
Becca's tattoo is in Dan's handwriting (5394771)

"People think that if you have cancer, your life is just bed and hospital appointments – but we did the weirdest and most fun things.”

In July, Dan's cancer had forced him to use a stick to help him walk. But it didn’t stop him from getting on with life. His motto was 'don't give in, don't give up'.

He had joked with Becca about getting married and in August, he proposed.

On September 12, the couple got married in Weston-Super-Mare in Somerset.

“Dan looked so well and didn't use his walking stick - you wouldn’t have even thought that he was sick," said Becca, originally speaking to Unifed.

"In the wedding photos, everyone said he looked like the Dan they knew before he had cancer.

"For him to look well and enjoy the day – that’s all I could have asked for.”

Becca and Dan before they wed (5394777)
Becca and Dan before they wed (5394777)

But a few days later as the couple were travelling to London, Dan's health unexpectedly began to deteriorate.

He was admitted to hospital in Bristol, where his condition was stabilised, and they returned home to Somerset.

But after a few nights the sickness returned and he was in so much pain that Becca called an ambulance.

A scan revealed that cancer had spread to his vital organs.

“He’d gone from being OK and being married a few days before the cancer reached the lining of his heart and his lungs," said Becca.

"It was horrendous. I remember crying my heart out when the doctor told me that they was nothing they could do.

“Before they’d asked Dan if he wanted to be resuscitated, but the doctors were now saying it would be kinder not to resuscitate him as as there was no chance of him surviving.”

Becca and Dan Thomas (5394779)
Becca and Dan Thomas (5394779)

Dan was then moved to a hospice where Becca, alongside his family, held his hand as he slipped away on September 28.

Becca says she has been inundated with kind messages since Dan's death which has given her strength.

She has also started her own vlog, talking about cancer, urging support for charities which support sufferers and families and how she is dealing with the grief.

“People need to know that the bravest thing you can do is to accept that you’re having a bad day, " she said.

"Nobody sees a widow and thinks ‘they’re fine’ – so it’s good to say to yourself that you’re not. There will be good days and bad days.

“All I know is that when I’m having a good day and I’m happy, I’m genuinely really happy. Because I remember that I now live my life for Dan as well.”

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