Ten years ago, 28-year-old Pat Lamb headed off into Maidstone town centre with his mates - a night out he tragically never made it home from.

Now, on the anniversary of his disappearance, his sister speaks of the hole that’s been left in the lives of his loved ones as she urges others to stay safe during the Christmas festivities…

00.20, Saturday, December 13, 2014 - that was the last sighting of Pat Lamb, a young man from Greenhithe who like many other lads of his age had just gone out for a few beers.

The 28-year-old had booked into the Grange Moor Hotel in Maidstone and settled down with a few drinks with friends before they headed off into town.

But as the night wore on, the broadcast engineer became separated from the group and was captured on CCTV wandering through the streets alone.

Just after midnight, a grainy image showed him walking towards Fairmeadow where he climbed a few steps down to the banks of the River Medway - the last time he was seen.

His disappearance sparked a massive search by friends, family and strangers who joined forces, following up possible sightings across the county.

Among those at the forefront of the effort to find Pat was his sister Zoe, who had just returned from university and had been staying with her brother in London when she learned of his disappearance.

She said: “I remember my dad calling me and saying that Pat hadn’t come home - that he hadn’t turned up at his hotel and that everyone was a bit worried.

“They hadn’t heard from him and he wasn’t answering his phone. I remember, and it haunts me still to this day, I got in my dad’s car the first thing I said was ‘is there a river in Maidstone?’

“I think back to that and think ‘why did I say that?’ But my dad replied and said: ‘Yeah, a really big one’.”

Volunteers from Kent Search and Rescue (KSAR) dedicated 1,000 hours to following up possible leads, specialist police divers scoured the River Medway, and a reconstruction video was circulated, retracing his steps that fateful night.

Missing person posters were plastered throughout the town and the community banded together to share the appeal, with 40,000 people joining a Facebook group to find Pat.

Allington Lock near Maidstone, woodland near the motorway service station on the M2 at Gillingham and Canterbury city centre were all under the spotlight.

Zoe, now 30, recalled: “It was awful. It was really hard. I don't think our presents were opened that Christmas. My mum just waited at home and was hoping that he would show up.

“Everyone was out celebrating and we were in the streets looking for him and putting up missing posters.

“It was really hard to get your head around when you're listening to Christmas songs talking about how happy and joyous and great the time is, and you're in this period of 'what's going on, where's my brother?'

“My Christmas should have been spent with my family, returning home from university for the break. Instead, we spent it walking around the streets, looking in industrial bins.”

Then, on Saturday, January 10, after a month of relentless searching, Pat’s family were given the news everyone had been dreading.

He had been found in the water at Cuxton Marina, and was identified by his clothing, phone, wallet and bank cards.

An inquest heard he died from immersion, meaning he could have drowned or suffered a cardiac arrest due to shock brought on by entering cold water.

There was an outpouring of grief following the devastating news, with floral tributes mounted along the riverside in Maidstone and crowds gathering in Mote Park where candles were lit and 500 helium balloons were released.

Zoe said: “I remember sitting on the living room floor and just crying and reading all of these messages.

“I read every single one. They were really lovely and it showed that [what had happened] had really touched people.

“Ten years on, I still hold so much space in my heart and want to give thanks to the strangers who provided support, offered kind words, and helped to raise awareness by sharing Pat’s missing poster. We all hoped for a better outcome, but, sadly, life doesn’t always unfold as we hope.”

Zoe is now hoping that sharing what happened to her brother could prevent other families from going through the same heartache.

She said: “I think it's crucial to raise awareness about how we can look out for one another when we’re out.

“It’s about keeping an eye on each other and noticing if someone is too drunk. In those situations, it’s usually better and safer for everyone to get them into a taxi.

“However, personal accountability is the most important factor. Friends can only do so much on a night out.

“It’s essential to check in with yourself, be aware of your limits, and pace yourself if you plan to stay out for the night. If you can’t walk straight, your chances of getting home safely are severely diminished, yet people still think it's a good idea or 'an adventure' to walk home instead of getting a taxi.

“It's just not worth the absolute trauma and heartache that myself and his loved ones and family have had to go through for the last 10 years. It is awful and I don't want that to happen to another family.

“So much went wrong so quickly for my brother - he took one turning too early that took him down to the river path.

“Unfortunately, the water that night, being winter, was at the same level as the river path and it wasn't lit so he didn't stand a chance.

“And that's how quickly things can change. If he didn't take that turning and he walked over the bridge to the hotel he would probably still be here today.

“It's just so sad for a 28-year-old to lose their life - that's so young, their life's just starting.”

Since Pat’s untimely death, KSAR has launched an annual safety campaign. Young men in particular are urged to keep an extra eye out for their drinking buddies at this time of year and keep away from water.

Now in its seventh year, the Safe and Dry operation will run throughout the 2024/25 festive season, with teams patrolling around the River Medway in Maidstone from late evening into the early hours. It is supported by the fire service, police and coastguard.

Head of the KSAR unit, Martin Kingman, said: ”From tragedies came the idea to run a proactive campaign to raise awareness and to ensure public safety close to dangerous waters, which seems to attract mainly young men at the end of a night out.

“We urge all revellers to ensure they do not walk home alone and that they buddy up to make sure everyone gets home safe and dry this Christmas.”

Reflecting on life without Pat, Zoe said: “Nighttime is the hardest part. Around midnight to 1am I will get upset because I know that's unfortunately when he died.

“You put yourself in his shoes of what he was going through and what he experienced. Not a day goes by where you don't think about him. As time goes on your grief doesn't get any smaller but I think you just learn to kind of move with it and it's always there but you go around it.

“No one will ever know the full extent of what happened that night, and, to be honest, it’s something I try not to dwell on.

“Instead, I focus on how fortunate I was to have him in my life and to call him my brother. I was only 20 when he passed away, and I wish I had more time with him as an adult. Even 10 years later, there isn’t a single day that goes by without him crossing my mind, and I’m sure his loved ones feel the same.

“You live knowing that there's this kind of hole - that there's meant to be someone here that isn't. You feel so cheated that their life has been cut short - he was 28 when he died.

“When I turned 29 it was really hard to get your head around that you're now older than your older brother.

“You think of all these kind of family moments that have happened that you know he hasn't been there for.

“The beautiful nephews he knew are now teenagers, and he has two new nephews and a niece—one of whom is named Riley Patrick.

“I met my partner a year after Pat passed. We’re now getting married, and I will always feel sadness that he never got the chance to meet Pat. However, without knowing him, he keeps his spirit alive for me. We raise a glass, and give thanks for showing us just how beautiful and precious life is.

“However, amid the sadness, there has been some comfort. I still stay in touch with the kind person who found my brother and stayed with him until the police arrived. Every year, we catch up, and she is a kind and pure soul to remember Pat's family, even after so much time has passed.”

Pat’s brother Jamie added: “During the time Pat when missing, my two-year-old son was also in and out of hospital battling cancer.

“Pat was a huge lifeline for us - he drove us to and from hospital, and was there for us whenever we needed, and then all of a sudden he was gone. We felt we lost this huge part of our support system at a time when we needed all the support we could get.

“So the anniversary is always a hard time, because it brings up a lot of emotion from that awful time. Harry beat cancer after Pat died, and we just wish he was here to see his nephew and the wonderful pre-teenager he’s turned into.

“I celebrate with a Guinness, to commemorate his life and the truly great brother he was to me.”