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Darent Valley Hospital nurse describes moment Joyce and Frank Dodd held hands before dying on same day

By: Suz Elvey

Published: 00:01, 05 May 2017

A nurse who wheeled a sick husband’s bed into his wife’s hospital ward so they could hold hands one last time has described how she fought back tears as she watched their last moments together.

Joyce and Frank Dodd made national headlines last week after KentOnline and sister paper the Gravesend Messenger told their story.

The couple, of Barr Road, Gravesend, had met as 14-year-olds and were married for 77 years.

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Joyce and Frank Dodd died on the same day after 77 years of marriage

But just over a month ago Joyce and her 96-year-old husband both fell ill and ended up on separate wards at Darent Valley Hospital.

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Nurse Kerry Mitchell was working on Redwood ward with palliative nurse Heidi Grieve when 97-year-old Joyce was brought in.

The 38-year-old mum of two, who lives in Dartford, said: “I didn’t know Frank was in as well until one of the palliative nurses mentioned it.

“Heidi came in saying she’d been with the family and they were distraught that dad was on one floor and mum on another.

“We both thought ‘let’s do this today, let’s make it happen’. It was now or never.”

The nurses asked Joyce and Frank’s family whether they would like them to bring the couple together for one final time and they said yes.

As the porters were busy, Kerry and Heidi went and found Frank when he was due to move wards and wheeled him on to his wife’s ward instead.

Kerry continued: “They were super cute. It was obviously a distressing time for the family but it was such a lovely atmosphere.

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“They lay there holding hands and he was talking to her. It was like a love story. It was adorable.

“After about an hour and a half we called the porters and they took Frank back upstairs.

Nurses Kerry Mitchell and Heidi Grieve

“We asked the other female patients on Joyce’s ladies-only ward first whether they were happy for us to bring Frank in and they said absolutely. Everyone had a tear in their eye.”

More than eight decades after they met, the couple died on the same day – Saturday, April 8, Frank at 4am and his wife at 6pm.

Kerry said she was usually able to emotionally detach herself from the situations her patients were going through but this time was different.

She said: “I was there when Joyce took her last breath. I said to her daughter, ‘I’ve got to be honest, I’ve got a tear in my eye, you guys have really touched me’. I don’t often get like that.

“The family were lovely. There was tea and tears and hugs, it was very emotional.

"They lay there holding hands and he was talking to her. It was like a love story. It was adorable" - Nurse Kerry Mitchell

“That’s the first time I’ve brought a couple together like that as part of their end-of-life care.

“It’s very unusual for a couple to die on the same day like that.

“We didn’t break any rules, we bring patients in wheelchairs to see their relatives. Frank was just in a bed. It was a whole team effort, different nurses, porters, patients, we couldn’t have done it without everybody.

“The fact they were together that long is amazing. ”

Kerry has only been a nurse for three years and has worked at Darent Valley since qualifying.

The team at Darent Valley Hospital, Dartford

For almost two decades beforehand she was a carer in a nursing home, always wanting to train as a nurse but never getting around to it as she looked after her two sons, now aged 16 and 18.

Heidi Grieve, 29, from Cuxton, has been a nurse for eight and a half years.

She became a palliative nurse two years ago after watching a man at a different hospital experience a “bad death” and wanting to stop other people going through the same thing.

Vikki Leivers-Carruth, director of nursing at Darent Valley Hospital, said: “I am incredibly proud of all of our compassionate, hardworking staff and even more so when things like this happen.

“I have been a nurse for almost 30 years and have witnessed on so many occasions the incredible kindness and compassion shown by all kinds of staff to patients, many of whom are facing the end of their lives.

How the Gravesend Messenger broke the story

“I would readily admit that we do not always get things right in healthcare but the vast majority of staff do their very best, often in very difficult circumstances.

“What is humbling and inspiring in this instance is the fact that what might seem like a small act has meant a great deal to the patients we were caring for and their family at a very difficult and sad time.

“Our thoughts are with the family of Mr and Mrs Dodd who were clearly an amazing couple who will be very sadly missed.”

Joyce and Frank, who were married at St George’s Church in Gravesend town centre, are survived by five children, 12 grandchildren, 10 great-grandchildren and two great-great-grandchildren.

Their joint funeral will be held at Gravesend Crematorium in Gravesend Road, Shorne, at 11am on Monday, May 15. The family has asked for donations to Cancer Research UK or the British Heart Foundation.

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