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Mum Tanya Carter becomes care worker after death of daughter

A woman has told of how the tragic loss of her two-year-old to cancer was the inspiration to become a care worker.

Tanya Carter, from Maidstone, was just 19 when her daughter Lekeyia died in 2003.

The baby was given just months to live after being diagnosed with acute myeloid leukaemia (AML) shortly after birth.

Tanya Carter whose daugthter Lekeyia died aged two
Tanya Carter whose daugthter Lekeyia died aged two

The rare and aggressive form of cancer, which affects around 3,100 people in the UK each year, had spread across Lekeyia's body.

Despite the initial shock of the diagnosis, she responded well to treatment with only a few cancer cells remaining.

The now 34-year-old mother's hopes were high and life with her child began to return to normal.

"They said she would only live for three months and were astonished when the chemo worked so well so we went home and bought her this electric bike which she would go down the hill on," she said.

"When we got home we had some sad news that her grandad had bone cancer but she was kind of an inspiration to him in that if she could get better so could he."

Sadly, despite making a strong recovery with the help of chemotherapy, the AML once again took hold.

"All I know from my experience is that it’s not a nice form of leukaemia and when it attacks the second time it really goes for you," said Tanya.

"Especially my daughter, she really suffered. She used to get a lot of pain and swelling."

Lekeyia
Lekeyia

Finally, Lekeyia's life came to a tragic end as she lost her battle with the disease.

"It didn’t make me go into a dark place but I did just want to be left alone," said Tanya.

"Because of the fact that I looked after her and was her main carer all the time it made acceptance easier.

"I had to be with her constantly so I kind of learnt to accept it.

"If she passed away then it was the right thing because she would not suffer any more.

"However, when she actually died I was a bit numb. I didn’t really take it in because I didn’t think it would happen to me.

"I’m quite a positive person and thought she would get through it.

"You just feel that it should not happen to such a young life. It’s not fair.

Tanya’s other girls: Taaliah, 13, Shola, eight, and Aveyah, two.
Tanya’s other girls: Taaliah, 13, Shola, eight, and Aveyah, two.

"The trauma came later on down the line. It came on about a year later because it was her birthday.

"I sat there and said to myself 'she should be here' those little things creep up on you."

At the time, Tanya was enrolled in an art course but her loss had made he reconsider what she wanted to do with her life.

After working for Barclay's Bank and then as a mortgage advisor until 2009 she decided to pursue a career in care when she moved from Reading to Maidstone.

She joined Bluebird Care shortly after it opened in the town in 2011 and is now the second longest serving care assistant at the company.

"It was a very hectic time around then and I didn’t find that finance was giving that oomph of life," she said.

"For me, being inspired to come into this job was for my daughter. She was my life so when I wasn’t at college I was in the hospital with her.

"I was stuck in hospital day and night with other children with different illnesses, it was quite depressing some times.

"It can be very hard but it’s made me a better person.

"Being in the job I’m in now I get to be out there, driving around and seeing people, and that’s more my personality."

Despite sometimes having to deal with clients who can be difficult, Tanya has formed strong, caring relationships with them through understanding.

"I think they are tricky because they have to deal with their situation. Being stuck in your house 24/7 there isn’t a lot of motivation.

"For me, being inspired to come into this job was for my daughter" - Tanya Carter

"But as soon as you build trust they become a different person.

"I am who I am and they like it unfortunately," she joked.

"Sometimes I think I’m a right old so and so talking a lot but they love it.

"I do go the extra mile sometimes and do extra things if they really need help like if they need some shopping. It’s just those little things.

"You get very close with them and they trust you as well."

Now Tanya is looking to the future with hopes of progressing her career to work more directly with cancer sufferers like her daughter.

"After being with Bluebird I’m looking at going to university to be a radiographer or study oncology to help people with cancer. The company is very supportive", she said.

Despite losing Lekeyia, Tanya has three happy, healthy daughters; Taaliah, 13, Shola, eight, and Aveyah, two.

"I feel like I live for my kids and they give me that oomph I need", she said.

In a curious twist of fate, her youngest was born on the same day and exactly 12 hours after the time Lekeyia died.

Tanya says that when she returned from the hospital the clock had frozen at the time of birth, 4.49.

"I just feel that my daughter lives on and she’s still being spoken about years down the line."

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