A government minister fears traffic jams sparked as a result of a no-deal Brexit could lead to an unlikely surge in... dogging.
The cabinet member is said to have confessed his worries for Kent's lay-bys and quiet car parks at last week's Conservative Party conference, The Sunday Times reports.
He fears stalled lorry drivers will get bored waiting in their cabs and head out seeking lewd liaisons.
“One of the things we talk about in these no-deal meetings concerns hauliers and their activities,” the minister said.
“The main thing is whether they will turn up at the Channel ports with the right paperwork. But there are also dogging hotspots all over the place.”
Dogging is the slang term for having sex with strangers or watching others do so in public.
The government's Yellowhammer contingency report warns Kent will face months of congestion and disruption, with significant two-and-a-half-day queues at ports. It does not mention dogging.
The fearful minister, who believes those delays on transport links to Dover will lead to a rise in the activity, is concerned about bored British truckers.
“Do Europeans even do dogging?" he added.
"There is something deeply British about dogging.”
While the cabinet tries to muster less delays at Kent ports, patrols at Penenden Heath Recreation Ground in Maidstone have been stepped up in a bid to curb dogging and cottaging.